Guy Hands, Tin Ear, Sore Loser

Now that's it's all over Mr. Guy Hands, let's face it, you behaved poorly. Get this, you were wrong. I'm sure you investment bankers know everything there is to know about money in the bank. But, this Robert thinks you've got a "tin ear," and that's never going to work in the music biz.

New Boss Not The Same As The Old Boss

This Robert can't seem to keep EMI out of his blog. Now it seems that recently appointed CEO, Elio Leoni-Sceti, is history, and a T.V. man, Charles Allen, is the new boss.


Looks like trying to sell Abbey Road Studios and being sued by Pink Floyd for selling their music is worse than increasing sales, or are we witnessing the dawn of a new era? Is this the big clue that we're finally going to see a merger with the patient Mr.Edgar Bronfman's WMG? It seems Old Charlie has a history as Mr. Merger.

Music Apathy: Is it the Record Biz's Own Doing?

According to industry analyst Russ Crupnick, the number of people buying music has dropped by 35 million from 2007 to 2009. Seems P2P file sharing has also declined. This is a classic case of MAD: Music Apathy Disease.

This Robert blames the established music biz for not focusing on new music. First, these companies are trying to sell the same music over and over again. Seems the only new music artists the major multinational companies are developing are the ones who have turned over all their rights in the "360" deal mentality. That's right, if the big companies don't own everything, no matter how good the music, it's not going to see the light of day if Mr. Big doesn't get his. It's not the smartest business plan, increasing profit at the expense of shrinking the market.

White Knight For Abbey Road Studios

My, my, Mr. Andrew Lloyd Webber wants to buy Abbey Road Studios now that Guy Hands has EMI selling the family jewels. This Robert is wondering if Lloyd Webber is going to be the highest bidder. 'Cause that's what really matters when you're hocking stuff to pay off the man.

Everyone Gets It But Guy

This Robert's been going on and on about Guy Hands and all those bankers trashing a jewel of a company, EMI, one of the last remaining stand alone music companies.

But Mr. Simon Duke has done such a splendid job of explaining just how bad this really is.

This Robert defers to him.

Guy Hands Pawns Abbey Road Studios

This Robert thought he's seen it all, but now our Guy Hands is selling off one of EMI's treasures to keep the bank off his back. Abbey Road Studios is on the blocks. "Come on Guy," this Robert's saying "Give it up! You're in way over your head."

2 Billion, A Lot To Lose

Well, well Mr. Guy Hands, how does it feel to lose 2 billion dollars? And you still have to come up with 120 million by June to keep the doors open. This Robert wonders, is anyone going to throw any more money down that dry hole? Especially when the head of EMI's recorded division warns you "that morale among the record company's staff and artists (and those artists' managers) was at an all time low."

Looks like that patient Edgar Bronfman is getting closer to his dream of buying EMI's record division. Plus, if this takes much longer, Mr. Bronfman might not have to pay much. This Robert remembers when Mr. Bronfman was going to pay big for the same thing. Instead Terra Firma bought it and saved WMG a billion.

Guy Hands Smart With Trash, Dumb With Music

Mr. Guy Hands, I see you're busking. Trying to attract some fools into buying part of your music business folly.

I hear you're having the record company write a business plan, and then you're going to pitch it to investors. Let this Robert write the business plan. It's the same for every record company ever been: "Hits, Hits. and more Hits!" That's the only way that the storied EMI won't fall into the hands of patient Edgar Bronfman and his WMG.

Guy, being smart with trash doesn't make you a music man.

Sly Stone Fooled Again

This Robert knows what it's like not to earn any $ from your music.

Sly Stone, what a sad tale of deceit and fraud. You claim you've been ripped off for the last 20 years, for 80 million bucks.

This Robert believes you. Your current manager, the mysterious Mr. Goldstein, not only fooled you. He fooled your former manager, the Mercantile National Bank, Sony Music, Warner/Chappell publishing, BMI, Soundexchange and the IRS.

I bet you didn't know in 1965 Jerry Goldstein and his posse ripped off the band name, The Strangeloves, from three Australian brothers, when they had their 1st hit. Dressing up in shaggy wigs and exotic clothing, they stole the shaggy brothers look too. Looks like Goldstein's at it again, when he stole Sly and the Family Stone from you. What a sad note for Grammy Day.

Beatles Bailout EMI As Usual

What's a bailed out bank doing in the recorded music business? During the high flying days of banking, Citigroup loaned Guy Hands' company, Terra Firma, billions to purchase EMI. Neither company knew anything about music. As you can guess, things went south. The banking crisis and the music business collapse makes this loan look questionable.

Citigroup wants to get their money back. Selling EMI to Edgar Bronfman and his Warner Music Group is the easiest way to accomplish that. But that leaves Guy Hands and Terra Firma out in the cold. Seems Hands and his company wants to hang on and get better terms. So to continue to repay the huge debt, EMI had to meet certain monetary considerations set by Citigroup.

It seems EMI's recorded music division just squeaked by, and barely passed the bank's financial status test, so they can continue to operate for now. So as it has in the past, the Beatles catalog bails out EMI. This Robert wonders how long can this go on? So does the patient Mr. Edgar Bronfman.

Web 2.0 Eats Its Own

Imeem, the popular music site, didn't even defend itself in court, and they lost big.

U.S. District Court Judge Denny Chin has fined the music site $1.77 million for copyright infringement. It seems The Orchard wanted Imeem to pay $150,000 per instance of infringement.

Imeem sold some of it's assets to MySpace, and folded. Imeem executives blame the lawsuit for shutting the doors.

How sad, the Web 2.0 music sites are eating their own. Please note The Orchard used copyright law just like the big boys. This Robert wonders if The Orchard is going to see any of this $?