My Turkish Bluesman

Ahmet, my Turkish bluesman, your memorial concert was the best. The Zeppelin was flying high. It was special!

The world should see this beautiful event dedicated to your memory. But concert footage from attendees is being yanked down from YouTube. There were plenty of people who couldn't make it to the show, who would like to share a little of the tribute to you. But it looks like the soul of your concert is being twisted. At first it looked like Warners Music Group was continuing their heavy handed approach to the Internet, but that ain't true.

It seems the greedy band is planning selling a DVD of the concert, and they don't want the clips to soften sales. Was this the real plan all along? Using your treasured memory to market a DVD? Well I guess once you're gone you're fair game for this bunch.

I've Got To Talk To Steve Jobs

Hey Mr. Jobs... those shiny music boxes your company created are driving recorded music into the hands of the people faster than the established music business can even imagine. I never benefitted from this "jukebox/radio" mindset of the last 60 years, so watching the "biz" unravel don't bother me much.

But Mr. Jobs... you're rich and powerful enough, so don't let your ego get the best of you. You and Mr. Woz have finally gotten even with those music guys for the debacle at the US Festival. You've kicked Doug Morris and Clive Davis's asses solidly.

But now let's think about the music. Is music one of those open source languages or not? Why does it seem like the French get this? And if you really believe music should be DRM-FREE, why don't you just do it?

Steve Jobs, you're the man who could FREE MUSIC NOW. Please don't disappoint history and culture just for a few more iPod sales. Or maybe you ain't much different than the carpetbaggers you've displaced.

Doug Morris At The Crossroads

Old Doug Morris, they sure are picking on you.


And you got such a fine singing voice, too! Doug Morris, you're a rare occurrence these days. You're a music man running a major label. That's why your company is doing so good.

I like when you stand up for us musicians, but I'm concerned you're using your business powers too harshly. From what that fellow from Nine Inch Nails says, it seems you like his website, but ya don't like letting Mr. Nails' fans mash up his music. So you put the kabosh on it.

Trent Reznor claims you put the hurt on his project because of some guy in your legal department. I know the history of the music business is fraught with lawsuits, but let's look at your pretzel logic, Mr. Morris. 'Cause you're suing MySpace, NIN music fans can't have fun foolin with NIN music. These fans have the blessings from the writer and the artist, it's your lawyers who are stopping this site from happening.

Shame on you, Mr. Morris! You're letting your legal department stop the growth of musical creativity in the name of legal confusion.

I Met The Devil At The Crossroads

I made the deal: fame and an early grave. The dying at 27 wasn't hard. Jimi Hendrix, Janice Joplin, Kurt Cobain, Jim Morrison... they all honored their deals. Dying that young ain't a curse, it's a blessing. Living for 27 years, some on top of the world, was fine. It's good to know when it's going to end.


But Sylvester Stewart, you're truly cursed. You cheated at the crossroads. Sly Stone, you had it all before you was 27. You're just a tortured soul now. The Devil don't have to do anything! Fool, you're doing it to yourself with the devil's candy. If you ain't gonna die, at least don't get on stage acting simple.

Bankers Can't Sing

I gotta speak up when it's business music, not the music business.

So... how come the banks own all the music these days?


Hey Guy Hands, if bankers are so smart, how come Facebook is valued higher than all the major labels combined?

No Hard Feelings

First, to those rock musicians who got rich stealing my riffs... I THANK YOU. I sure appreciate the fame you gave me, and I surely don't need the money you made off of my songs. I just wish I could have played one of those fine electric guitars.

Next, Ahmet Ertegun... I thank you for discovering the Led Zeppelin and Ray Charles. Plus, my Turkish blues man, if you got to go, backstage is as good a place as any.

Hey, Mr. Edgar Bronfman... ain't DRM the dumbest thing? Those Led Zeppelin CDs you're selling don't have any DRM. So ain't it like closing the hen house door after all the chickens have run out? Unless... you are the fox?